Credit Crunch Laughs!

It’s not all doom and gloom. At Lok’nStore Household & Business Self Storage, we saw these credit crunch jokes and thought they might cheer you up!

• How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday.
• Resolving to surprise her husband, an investment banker’s wife pops by his office. She finds him in an unorthodox position, with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitation, he starts dictating, “…and in conclusion, gentlemen, credit crunch or no credit crunch, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair!”
• What’s the difference between Investment Bankers and London Pigeons? The Pigeons are still capable of making deposits on new BMW’s
• What’s the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza? A large pizza can feed a family of four.
• The last time Iceland had a crash like this aisle three was closed all day.
• Q: Why are all MBAs going back to school? A: To ask for their money back.
• I had a cheque returned earlier. “Insufficient Funds” Mine or the banks?
• What have Icelandic banks and an Icelandic streaker got in common? They both have frozen assetsMoney talks. Trouble is, mine only knows one word – goodbye.
• What is a banker’s favourite chocolate bar? A credit crunchie!
• Why didn’t the little boy get any pocket money this week? Cos his Mum’s gone to Iceland!
• For Geography students Only: What’s the capital of Iceland? Answer: About Three Pounds Fifty…
• The latest news, the Isle of Dogs Building Society has collapsed. They’ve called in the retrievers.
• Quote of the day (from a trader): “This is worse than a divorce. I’ve lost half my net worth and I still have a wife.”
• QUESTION: How do you successfully freeze your financial assets? ANSWER: Invest in an Icelandic bank
• Talked to my bank manager the other day and he said he was going to concentrate on the big issues from now on. He sold me one outside Boots yesterday!
• Masked man holding a bank cashier up with a gun. Says: ‘I don’t want any money – I just want you to start lending to each other